When I was a Woodling and you were an Elf
And you were too young to look after yourself
I undertook to see you through
I did all you asked and a little more too
Each morning at breakfast you had open lips
While I ate your bacon, you ate my chips
And after we'd go to a nearby copse
You did your firelighting while I did my knots
We preached high morals, free love and the rest
To stick to our scruples, we did our best
Each night as our fair little heads touched the pillow
We stripped, we stripped, we stripped ... the Willow
Oh dearest, oh darling, I try to forget
The tears of sorrow, the long year of regret
It was like losing my complementary half
When you ran off with a member of Staff